U.K. Joe - Smoke Gets In Your Eyes/ Deadwood Central

Short, snappy northern singalong-an-Esso-advert

Label: Bell

Year of Release: 1972

The Platters version of "Smoke Gets In Your Eyes" was one of my Dad's favourite singles, frequently spun and gently sung along to, although in retrospect I do wonder how much he just enjoyed the OTT melodrama of it. There was always the faint trace of a smile around his face as he listened to the record as if he loved the way they were milking the whole 'big boys don't cry' situation. "Tears?" The Platters seem to be saying. "No my friend, these aren't tears, it's just this club is so damn smoky. We should go somewhere different in future". "Smoke Gets In Your Eyes" pushes the scenario to such an extent that it could almost become a comedy sketch about men in denial. 

There's a long history of songs for men who are incapable of being honest about their emotions, from "Smoke" to "I'm Not In Love" to "Words" by FR David and God knows what else in between. All tend to slather the emotional repression with thick, treacly arrangements which almost over-emote, and it's long been a source of fascination to me the way these tracks demonstrate the expressive limitations of the average man by pushing the melodrama to the max. "This is my outlet, and I'll scream within the walls of it if it stops me going completely mad", seemed to be the message of the singers.

"Smoke Gets In Your Eyes" ended up getting a second, somewhat trivial wind in the early seventies, though, when it became used in adverts for Esso Blue paraffin, led by a mysterious everyman character called Joe. "They asked me how I knew/ It was Esso Blue/ I of course replied/ with lesser grades one buys/ smoke gets in your eyes" ran the tune afresh, and the subject subsequently moved itself on to more blokeish practical matters which everyone probably felt more comfortable with. 

This led to the release of two new versions of the track, one reggae take by Blue Haze which managed to peek into the Top 40 briefly in 1972, and... this. An utterly baffling take very similar to one which appears on the end of an Esso flexidisc. In it, a northern character called UK Joe appears to be leading a bar or club filled with people in a sing-a-long lasting just over a minute-and-a-half. The crowd sing competently after his shouted cues and the band behind him blast out their best forties Vera Lynn arrangements, but it's hard to understand how anybody would have needed to own it. It's a burst of music, a jingle, a brief idea to raise a slight smile and little more. It's a truly unimaginable A-side, but here we are, discussing it as such. 

Good Ship Lollipop - Maxwell's Silver Hammer/ How Does It Feel

Label: Ember
Year of Release: 1969

Here's a riddle for you all - which Beatles album tracks haven't been released as singles by other singers or groups based anywhere in the world? "Revolution #9" would, I suppose, be the first obvious answer to this question, closely followed by "Her Majesty" and some of the other song cycle tracks off "Abbey Road" (but by no means all of them). After that, I wouldn't be willing to place too many bets. Wherever there's a Beatles song which hasn't been issued as a single already, there's always been somebody out there trying to generate a hit with it for their own group or label.

"Maxwell's Silver Hammer" is probably one of the more bizarre choices I've come across. "Abbey Road" is an astonishing album which showcases, possibly more than any other Beatles LP, how untouchable Paul McCartney's songwriting skills could often be. Taking McCartney's talents for granted has sadly become something of a familiar stance in recent years, but one listen to the roller coaster ride that is the song cycle on Side Two should be proof enough that the use of the word "genius" is not, in this case, inappropriate. Despite this, there is one definite weak spot on the record, and it's this thudding, clanging novelty march about a fictional mass murderer. Passably amusing for the first listen and then progressively more and more irritating thereafter, "Maxwell's Silver Hammer" is the kind of track skip buttons were invented for, doing very little but stink the place out with its violent whimsy. Whole debates have been had about why the hell this, of all the "Abbey Road" tracks, was granted such an early slot on the album.

Still, The Good Ship Lollipop - who I assume were a studio group - produce an accurate facsimile of it here, and one which is likely to be of interest to people curious about Beatles cover versions. A certain chirpiness and polite jollity is added to the fantasies about caving skulls in, and does, to my ears, add a few new twists to the track.

The B-side is interesting too, being a cover version of the sixties rarity "How Does It Feel" by The Perishers. It fails to match the mod majesty of the original track, but is definitely a slightly rawer and rougher interpretation.

Biggles - Gimme Gimme Some Lovin'

Label: Philips
Year of Release: 1971

Given that I didn't have any Christmas records to upload this year, I thought I couldn't just leave you all disappointed without any party tracks before present opening day (because of course, this blog has been soundtracking everyone's house parties for years now). So here's one.

"Gimme Gimme Some Lovin'" is nothing more or less than a glam rock medley combining the Transatlantic bubblegum hit "Gimme Gimme Good Lovin'" with the Spencer Davis Group's "Gimme Some Lovin'". Whooping, cheering and "Barbara Ann" styled party noises are worked into the mix to create something which sounds like the biggest rave-up since I heard "Gimme Hope Joanna" being played by a band in a pub in East London one summer to an assortment of booze-added cockneys. You don't hear the like very often. There's a thudding glam beat backing all this as well, which adds an extra layer of rowdiness, and in all whilst nobody could pretend this is a particularly sophisticated piece of work, it sounds bloody fantastic if you've had enough beer on a cold winter evening.

Biggles were essentially a studio based group created by one Mike Berry, who worked as a music industry mover and shaker for many years for both Sparta Music and The Beatles' publishing arm of Apple. It's probably safe to say that when this record flopped, no follow-ups were attempted under this name. You can read more about Berry's career on the Mersey Beat website.

This record also featured on the marvellous Purepop blog some years ago, where the author Robin Wills has done a fantastic amount of Mike Berry related trawling over the years. In fact, when I made the schoolboy error of mistaking this Mike Berry with the Joe Meek/ "Are You Being Served" Mikester awhile ago, he was quick to spot my on-blog mistake and contact me.

Back Street Band - This Ain't The Road (b/w "She's Clean")

Label: Ember
Year of Release: 1970

Well, it would seem that first impressions can be incredibly misleading - I had assumed that the Mike Berry behind the production of this single was the same Mike Berry behind the tribute to Buddy Holly and of "Are You Being Served?" fame, but apparently it's an entirely different songwriter and producer who has been covered in great depth over at the Purepop blog.

"This is the Road" is one of many late sixties/ early seventies singles which took the Lennon blueprint of creating a slogan-driven, foot-stomping song which tries to bulldoze you into submission with its incessant repetition.  It actually manages to be a bit more commercial and perhaps almost as effective as a lot of early Lennon singles (and certainly more interesting than "Cold Turkey") and as such has been put on a few sixties collectors want lists.  There's an anthemic quality to it which also isn't terribly shy of the work of the Gallagher brothers, two other Beatles imitators who, had they been around during the seventies, might have been tagged with the "late period popsike" description on a few occasions.

Oddly for a flop record during this period, the single was issued twice by Ember, once in November 1969 when it was backed with "Daybreak", then again in July 1970 as a re-recorded version with "She's Clean" on the flip side this time.  My version is the latter one, and it's clear that somebody at the record label thought that this was an absolute, guaranteed hit single, and perhaps considered the November failure of the record as an example of some solid gold goodness getting lost in the pre-Christmas market.  Whichever executive made the decision to re-issue the record must have been sorely disappointed when it failed for a second time, and the Back Street Band were seemingly not afforded any further chances in the studio.